


A Librarian's Guest

by opalheart



Category: Touhou Project
Genre: Books, F/F, Library, Magic, Tea, overly eloquent dialogue, tongue-in-cheek use of the word queer by two gay girls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:27:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24932989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/opalheart/pseuds/opalheart
Summary: A conversation between two nerds.Just a short little chatlog-style fic to practice writing dialogue!
Relationships: Kochiya Sanae/Patchouli Knowledge
Comments: 4
Kudos: 7





	A Librarian's Guest

S: I'm looking for a book.

P: And I'm looking for a new job. Got any suggestions?

S: I hear Hakurei is hiring.

P: That was a joke, and I would rather grease the treads of a running kappa seatank.

S: Sarcasm isn't my forté.

But it could be if you want.

P: Why would I want that of a girl? Anyways, the name of the book, shrine maiden?

S: It's called Esoterica, Vol. III. The only volume missing from my shelf. 

Its contents have eluded me for ages as I pored through the pages of the other two. 

I've memorized every occultic spell and sinister design. 

With their final sibling, the tomes tease a greater understanding of their triptych ties to the underworld.

P: I know the three books. My head ached before I finished the 80th sestet. 

Trust me, it's drab, you don't need the completed set.

S: I must have misunderstood your position. Should I call you Mistress Galaxy-brain, the purveyor and final authority of all fine magical tomes?

P: Oho, so you do know how to pick at a magician.

What chains so bind you to the esoteric that you wander the halls of scarlet devils?

S: No chains. Only charm, which seemed to work on the little devil back there.

P: We're not all as malleable as Koa.

S: She must have heard you. I think that was a whiney objection in the distance.

As for objective, I only seek power. Living gods live well beyond those who wait.

P: Like a god, ambitious beyond restraint. 

And like a human, impatient. Yeah, that checks out.

S: Is ambition a good look on me?

P: ...It suits you. 

Where'd you inherit it from?

S: A snake.

P: What serpent lets its servant run her own errands?

S: One who knows the potential of powerful things, and humans.

P: Sounds more like a tsuchinoko.

S: She may lie, but she's not a heavy drinker.

P: Unlike me.

Would you join me for some tea?

S: I thought you'd never ask, my dear.

P: Then let’s make our way to the brewroom so we can take a seat among the words.

S: Ahh, I’ll get to feel like an honored guest. 

I do so enjoy the infinite array of stories, neatly rowed on the shelves… 

The spines make a colorful mosaic.

P: Sounds like something a bookworm would say.

But… well… thanks.

S: I can see you blushing, you book centipede.

I’m going to hold that hand of yours the rest of the way, since it looks so holdable.

P: No choice in that, eh?

Your palm feels... like a mushroom cap.

S: Yours is like a mochi ball. A fitting texture to grasp as we leave gravity behind.

Among these skyscrapers of lore I admire, I inquire. 

How does one get a hold of this much... knowledge?

P: Well, we’ve been the sole library in Gensokyo for a few thousand years… 

Lots of donations… Lots of time to gather books... Lots of time to write them.

S: I have to wonder. You must have, right? Are they stored here? Nonfiction? Or novels? Or poetry? Maybe… doujin?

P: Material I’ve authored myself?!

No… I’ve never. I don’t know how to write. I don’t know how to read, I don’t have the slightest what you’re talking about.

S: Now I know you have. 

Locked away in a distant chamber, perhaps? Say, can we change course?

P: You wound my ego, Sanae. 

We’re almost to the entrance, so float on downward.

S: After you.

How ornate a tableset... The woven cloth, too.

The ceilings are lower, here. I can see the details in the carving.

But still not an inch of blank wall. Don’t tell me… Is this your personal collection?

P: Just a few works that I’m digging into at the moment.

Mystery novellas and political theory, largely.

S: Christie and Marx, Conan Doyle and Luxemburg...

I can’t seem to lay my eyes on any Gensokyoan authors?

P: We mostly write romance, or thrillers.

Too much mystery lays abound in our ordinary lives already.

S: You deserve a little romance and thrill, my lonely librarian.

P: It’s appreciated, but I enjoy the quiet.

Which flavor attracts your fancy? Chai, black, honeysuckle, citrus, mint leaf...

S: Lavender.

P: Certainly, but why are you looking at my hair like that…? 

...Ah, I get it.

In that case... I'll have matcha...

S: <3

P: How did you make that sound with your mouth?

S: See, this is why you should have finished Esoterica.

P: There's no way it teaches you how to do that.

S: How do you know? <3

Anyway, you never outright revealed if you have my volume somewhere in these literary corridors.

P: What’ll you do with it if I said we do?

S: Borrow it.

P: In the language of human girls, does that imply actually returning it?

S: Well… I was hoping to work my way up to that.

I could return it… Or I could give you something in return.

What kind of donations do you accept?

P: Here’s your tea, mischievous one.

It’s my library, so I can decide the currency of choice.

What if I requested payment in secrets?

S: It’s warm and enveloping. I can taste your experience steeped in the water.

As for secrets, it depends what kind.

Don’t you know most of them already?

P: About your god. The new arrival.

S: I already told you about Kanako. Serpentine and deceitful.

P: The other one.

S: Knowledge of her… How did you extrapolate something like that?

P: Your hair pin, Sanae.

I guess I accidentally gave you the tea that makes you empty-headed.

S: Is that a thing?!

P: No… you’re going to be the death of me.

S: Oh, kind of disappointing… 

Well, apologies, but they’re not my secrets to give.

Even if they were, I don’t know much. Suwako is simply a frog. Hop hop. Kero kero. The usual.

The woman lives in the inner sanctum of the shrine, waiting for challengers.

P: That’s a little familiar. I think they’d be friends.

S: Say again?

P: Oh, nothing at all.

Well… if not of them, could you tell me secrets of your own?

S: A little truth or dare, Patchouli? I wouldn’t suspect you the type.

Sure, but then you have to tell me something.

P: I thought this was a donation.

S: Okay, okay… Searching my mind for the forbidden Sanae knowledge...

I'm imbued by both Kanako and Suwako's powers, so, depending on my mood...

Sometimes I’m more of a flippy-tongued floozy, and sometimes I'm more of a... slithering sociopath.

P: Are you ever more of a normal person?

S: That's the one thing I can never be, Patchouli…

P: I guess you're always just going to be queer, then.

S: You're the queer one, queer.

What else, hm?

I read the end of books before the beginning.

I always wear mismatched socks.

My natural hair color is brunette.

When I’m bored, I pepper unsuspecting women with affection.

Is there anything else you’re dying to know?

P: One more quick question.

Why are humans like this?

S: Oh, you know.

P: No, I don’t.

Though I wonder how much time I can kill swishing my stirrer around in an empty cup, while looking deep in thought.

S: If you’re wanting to spend more time with me, you can just ask.

P: Fine…

4F-37C. That’s where you’ll find it.

S: Brilliant!

As much as I’ve pestered you, I truly appreciate your help and expertise.

You’re much sweeter than you let on, I theorize.

P: I theorize you’re just a little too on the nose.

But, your saccharine words gave me respite from the day-in, day-out.

Shout down the southeast wing if you need any assistance.

~

S: I found the one. My ever-out-of-reach book of spells.

P: Impressive.

It’s smaller than I thought.

S: A lot can be said with a little.

Oh, and I have a return.

P: You didn’t tell me about that part.

Well, just slip it into the dropbox.

S: By the way, it seems this was your only copy of this particular Esoterica.

If you ever feel like finishing what you started, you’ll have to come up to Moriya.

P: A wiley offer from a confident girl.

We’ll see if I can drag myself out of here, but… you do have quite the pull.

S: Hehe.

P: What's that book you returned, anyway?

"How to Flirt With a Youkai"...??

...You’re obvious.

S: Yet, you’re oblivious. <3


End file.
